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Married life can never be an obstruction to those who are endowed with dispassion and
detachment to worldly objects and who consider that life is intended to mould one’s own self by
drawing lessons from the university of Nature. Study the lives of saints like Thyagaraja,
Ekanath, Narsi Mehta, Bhadrachalam Ramdas, Tukaram, Namdev, Jayadeva, Chaitanya and
Kabir. Probe deep into the world and the way in which the above-mentioned saints and a host of
others actually led their lives.
It is disgraceful on the part of man if he tries to please himself by pleasing his wife. He
who considers married life as intended to please his wife is worse than an abject slave. Be selfrestrained.
Let the wife be made aware of the aim and purpose of life and the ways and means of
attaining it in and through Grihastha life. Do not yield to the lower impulses when prompted by
your incorrigible nature or by the stubborn character of the other party, but arrange yourself in
such a balanced way that the psychic and physical personality of neither is upset. Whatever
actions you do, dedicate them to God and consider them not as yours. Pray for a self-purifying,
contented and continent life. Resign yourself recklessly in the spiritual battlefield and make no
retreat even if life happens to be at stake. Be a master over yourself and treat yourself as a
servant of God, but not as a servant of your wife. Feign that you are one with your wedded
partner, but be ever transcending in mental outlook. You can be on the safe side of life.

From "May I answer that" by Swami Sivananda (1987-1963). More Informations on Swami Sivananda: on the Website of Divine Life Society, Photographs of Swami Sivananda, German Pages on Swami Sivananda