towards his wife, constantly worried as he is on the count that his wife is not beautiful?
How can he manage to conceal his pent-up feelings of frustration caused by the lack of
beauty in his wife - aesthetically speaking - and yet manage to lead a healthy, happy,
harmonious married life?
It is not in the power of man to choose this beautiful girl or that, nor in the power of a girl
to select this handsome or rich man or that. Everything is predestined. Man forgets this glaring
fact, ignores this essential truth and thinks and feels that he is the real doer or the enjoyer. Say
and console yourself: “Daivadheen, Daivadheen. Lord’s Will, Lord’s Will”. Think and feel that
everything that befalls your lot at any moment of your life is for the best. Be convinced of this
grand truth and rejoice in philosophic indifference and stoic unconcernedness. Physical beauty is
no beauty at all. It is skin deep. That woman who has the beauty of the virtue of chastity is the
really beautiful woman on earth. This is in consonance with the proclamation of the great lawgiver
Manu. Study Manu Smriti, the Neeti Sastra of Manu. Hammer the mind again and again
with the saying of Manu, “Chastity is the beauty of an ugly woman”.
Beauty and ugliness are mental Kalpanas, illusory creations of the mind only, just as
sweetness or bitterness lies in the mind and mind alone. Such are the Dharmas of the mind. Rise
above the mind. Then you will be able to find beauty in ugliness, sweetness in bitterness and
good in bad. Even the ideas of goodness, sweetness and beauty disappear when the proper grade
of evolution is achieved.
The hand stands for Seva, the heart for Bhakti or Prem and the head for the intellect. This
is a very rare combination which can be found in very few people. Beauty is the inner spirit of
purity in a woman, at the very sight of which man is thrilled to horripilation and raised to heights
of elysian bliss. That is to be treated as “true beauty”.
Always try to see the good, the beautiful, the auspicious, the pleasant, however
condemnable the worthy object of adoration be, on account of negative qualities. Then and then
alone will you be able to evolve into the Infinite in greater and more abundant measure. As long
as man limits himself with constricted notions and cherishes debasing, negative and dualistic
thoughts, he is not to be considered as an expanded soul. Mentally prostrate before the woman
who has the virtues of an Adarsha Pativrata as embodied in the epics of Bharata Varsha. Mend
yourself. Feel that your position, your status, your earning capacity and your personality are but
trash and a trifle when compared to the abundant wealth of beauty of solidified virtue of your
wife. Give up egoistic assessment of values in life.
From "May I answer that" by Swami Sivananda (1987-1963). More Informations on Swami Sivananda: on the Website of Divine Life Society, Photographs of Swami Sivananda, German Pages on Swami Sivananda
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